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At some point or another, I think most of us have lost track of who we are – I’m sure that you can relate? One day you just stop and realise that you feel adrift and that your life isn’t quite what you had imagined all those years ago. Feeling a little lost and disconnected is absolutely normal especially as we age or when life throws us an unexpected challenge.
While it’s a deeply personal path and one that often requires a little alone time and contemplation, I wanted to share a few things that have worked for me over the years in the hope that one or two of them might help you find your way back to yourself.
Acknowledge that you feel lost
I know that it’s not the easiest feeling to manage, but recognising that you’re feeling disconnected does at least give you a place to start from. Embrace the emotion and try to see it as something positive – a turning point that you can use to get back on track or rediscover the person that you used to be.
Trying to reconnect to the way you were – or the way you would like to be from now on – can seem overwhelming. And, sometimes it can feel that only big steps will make a difference.
But, start by stepping back and thinking of the small changes that you could make instead – manageable chunks that fit into your day. What did you enjoy before you started feeling disconnected? Maybe you loved to hike in the woods, spend quality time with friends or lose yourself in a good book? How can you bring those things back into your life, not all at once but for a few minutes every day or an afternoon each week? They can feel like such simple changes but they give you a solid foundation to start from.
Buy a journal
Even if you’ve never tried it, find a beautiful journal or notebook and pour your thoughts and feelings into it. If you feel uncomfortable about leaving your words where someone else may read them, write on a page that can be burnt or destroyed when you are through. The aim is not necessarily to read it all back but just to get those thoughts out of your head; it doesn’t even need to make sense or be in actual sentences! But, as you write things may begin to become a little clearer. I’ve done this ever since I was a teenager and even today when overwhelm strikes I grab a pen and start writing!
Go somewhere new
New experiences help to bring us out of ourselves and break the pattern of everyday things that may have become a routine and have lost the enjoyment that they once had. Breaking a few everyday patterns helps us escape the inevitable ruts that we can all fall into. This can be as simple as visiting somewhere new for lunch, taking a new route, discovering a new class; maybe something creative – you get the idea!
Find time for yourself
That might only be a few minutes to pause and breathe deeply but it’s still time for you. Work with what you have. These short pauses give you time to check in with yourself and find calm in your day. Build slowly upon them and use these small moments to establish a calm inner space to retreat to whenever you need it.
Re-think your approach to food and drink
Listening to your body is a great place to find more reconnection with yourself. And, while I do not believe in diets as such, I do know that a healthy body and mind is priceless. So, where could you start? Most of us instinctively know what changes we need to make and we’ve never had so much information at our fingertips; try doing a little research and see where it leads.
Again, this is a place where small changes will bring you the most success because they’re so much easier to stick to.
Create space in every way that you can, clear out your wardrobe, kitchen cupboards, desk…everything that you have time. Why? Because a clear space create a clear mind and I believe that by creating physical and energetic space in our lives we encourage the universe to send us more of the things that we dream of.
RECONNECT RITUAL KIT
AUTHOR: LEANNA DOOLIN
Co – Founder of holistic skincare brand, Pure Thoughts and advocate for women finding pause in their day to breathe deeply, give thanks and reconnect to what matters. Loves early mornings, dogs and books that you can’t put down.